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Dealing With A Break Up Online Secret Friends Guide

Dealing With A Breakup And Looking To Start Again

By Janine Jensenoris

Dealing with a breakup can be a rather emotional time, when you need to start again. You can start by dating new people. You can take the long way and hope to meet new dates at social events, nightclubs and all night bars. The other option, is to find dates much quicker by going online and become a member of several dating sites.

From the comfort of your own home, you can go online and visit several dating sites. The really good sites have many dating resources, like online chat, live web cams, review and browse dating profiles of potential dates and take advantage of many other dating facilities. Most of these dating sites charge a membership fee and you will find they are worth the cost.

Some dating sites are free, but have very limited resources and may not be as useful as the sites with many more dating resources. You may try out one or two free sites, just to gain experience with online dating and then look at joining better dating sites.

Now you know your options to start again when dealing with a break up.

Mixed Emotions Of Hurt And Relief

No matter what your age or gender, dealing with a breakup is always painful. Teens who break up with their boyfriend or girlfriend can feel terribly hurt, even if the relationship was relatively short.

Due to a lack of experience in dating, dealing with a breakup can seem like the end of the world. Adults are usually better equipped to deal with a breakup, in varying degrees. Adults have the advantage of experience, but sometimes this only engenders different emotions.

A Whole Range Of Emotions

If you’re the one who initiated the breakup, you may feel an enormous sense of guilt for having hurt this person. If you’re the one being ‘dumped’, you may have intense feelings of inadequacy, anger and, in some cases, a desire for revenge. These emotions span all age groups.

Younger adults who have broken off with a relationship of some months standing, may turn anger on themselves in the form of self chastisement. “How could I have been so stupid as to not see him/her for what he/she was in the first place?”

Married With Kids Have The Most Difficulties

Married couples who break up naturally have a little more baggage to deal with, due to the seriousness of the commitment to marriage. Married couples with kids often have the most difficulty in dealing with a breakup. You must reconcile not only your own emotions, but be sensitive to your kids feelings about the situation, putting your own on the back burner for the time being.

Most people who find themselves ending a relationship have at least one or two supportive friends to lend an ear and a shoulder to cry on, but you should try to avoid overindulging yourself. Because your friends are naturally ‘on your side’, this can soon turn into a self-pitying fest that does no one any good.

People Change And Friends Go Their Separate Ways

It’s OK to indulge yourself for a little while, but don’t get obsessive with the self pity or wallow in endless discussions of what a rotten person he or she really was. After all, you did have something in common at some point in time and shared both good and bad times.

One helpful strategy in dealing with a breakup is to ask yourself, near the end of the relationship, were you really all that happy? Chances are, the answer is no. You need to accept that people change and their journey through life may take them on a path that you’re not willing or able to follow.

Knowing The Time To Move On

People who marry young are often lacking in maturity and life experience. The couple who, in their early 20s, both wanted nothing more than to be with one another, may change their focus in their 30s or even 40s, each having exhausted the attraction of their original infatuation, finding nothing left of substantive compatibility.

While it’s sad to find yourself at such a juncture, it’s really not healthy to continue in a relationship when you’re no longer happy. You both deserve to have a little happiness in this life. Knowing when it’s time to move on can be the most trying emotion to work through when dealing with a breakup.

Chatting In Relationship Forums Online

Understand that all of these feelings are normal emotions and reactions. You may find that a good self help relationship book can help you work through some of the pain and gain a better understanding of how you got where you are.

Another good strategy in dealing with a breakup is to find a relationship forum online, where you’ll surely find many of your own feelings echoed by other forum members. Again, try to avoid the self-pity game, as this is only counterproductive to your objectives: to start feeling good again and move on with your life.

Get out and do things that make you feel good. Visit friends. Make new friends. Get involved with helping other people. You’ll be surprised at how much better you can feel. Dealing with a breakup isn’t easy, but is certainly not the end of the world. It’s time to be happy again. You deserve it.

Start With Dating New People

There is never the best time to start again. But if your relationship is over, then you need to start again by dating new people. People you have never met before, or people you vaguely know. You can start by going to places you have stopped going to, because you were so much involved in your previous relationship.

You can meet new people at social events, parties, nightclubs and visiting relatives you have not seen in ages. Hopefully, on this long journey you will meet someone who will be perfect for you. There is another option. You can go online and become a member of dating sites, to arrange dates with people in your area.

Online Dating Resources

Dating sites have many resources you can use to meet new dates. There are online chatting facilities, live web cam dating and exchange emails. You can also place your dating profile on these dating sites, so that potential dates can contact you. You can also browse through the dating profiles to find appealing dates.

You can meet all these potential dates, from the comfort of your own home, just by online dating. These are some of the many options when you are dealing with a breakup and need to start again.

About the Author: Janine Jensenoris is a popular author of dating articles including Adult Personals, Blind Dating, Chat Websites, Real Friends, Adult Party Favors, Conversation Starters, Abusive Relationships, Difficult People, Anger Management, Interracial Relationships.
Keep a lookout for more articles coming soon.

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